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the lion’s roar
echoing into night
sweet honey farmed
hives harvested
by the worn hands
the stream divides land
swells from rain
heaven’s tears falling
sun breaks midnight
darkness, dew, misty
drying from heat
thick scales flake
from skin
left by the snake
molting
new life begins
in days coming
breathing, smoking, gasping
evil eyes
spark fire
from the innocent
the snake moves slowly
tall grass
hiding
the snake shall
tempt one more

Article posted at http://sonwriter101.com

1. Cut your intro in half. One of the most important things to remember if you’re writing songs for the commercial market is how very little time you have to get the listener’s attention. We, as songwriters, necessarily give our songs our full, loving and undivided attention, which is why a long, winding musical intro feels perfectly natural as a way to set the stage for the song to come. The reality, though, is that our listeners rarely give a song they’ve never heard their full attention, which is why you, as the songwriter, have to go and get it. Quickly. A short, to-the-point intro that leads directly into the verse of the song is the first step towards pulling your listener in.

2. Put more concrete details into your verses. The verses in your song are there to, more or less, tell the story. While feelings are an important part of any story, so are the actual details. In other words, give people images to hold on to so they know what your song is about. Since you’re the one writing the song, you already know the story, so it’s easy to forget that your listener doesn’t. While you’re at it, I’m a big believer in the “show ‘em, don’t tell ‘em” approach. This means if you can use an image rather than a long explanation to describe a situation, do it. Whoever wrote “a picture is worth a thousand words” had it right.

3. Your chorus should be what your song is about. In another effort to help you keep the big picture in mind while you’re writing, I’d suggest making sure that your chorus really drives the point of your song home. This is the place where your message becomes clear and memorable. Ideally, the listener should be able to start singing along after they’ve heard your chorus once or twice. Another, less delicate way of putting this is to think of your chorus as the equivalent of tying the theme of your song to a baseball bat and beating the hell out of people with it.

4. Make sure similar sections have similar structures. In general, it’s a good idea to keep similar sections in your song similar in structure. In other words, your first verse should match your second verse in number of lines and rhyme scheme and your choruses should have the same length and lyric. There are always exceptions to this approach but here’s the reasoning behind it: The simpler and clearer your song is, the more memorable it will be. Memorable is a good thing. I’m in no way suggesting not to tackle complex topics or musical themes, I’m simply saying that “complicated” and “different” don’t, in and of themselves, mean success. The real challenge is to tell your story, whatever it may be, in the simplest, most effective way possible.

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